an incomplete thought about transcendence and blogging and solidarity

i feel like i'm in this really transcendent period in my life right now and i'm discouraged by the lack of real, raw experiences out there that i can gain inspiration from. in this century, in this euphoric era of living, where dreams are coming true and things are happening and paths are being forged and technology is saving lives, i've come to rely on the strong, successful women i've come across on the internet to tap into their confidence and somehow find my own.

i'm frustrated by the ratio of lifestyle posts to sponsored, "c/o" posts. i'm frustrated by the progressively shorter skirts worn by mormon mommy bloggers and mormon fashion bloggers. i'm frustrated that i can't be taken seriously because my sidebar isn't stuffed with pixelated, home-made sponsor buttons, and because i'm not hosting a giveaway or participating in a link up or sourcing that everything i wore in this photo was given to me for free simply because i exist here on this web page and people like it, i'm not a "real blogger". that's not what this was for. at least, not for me.

i didn't start blogging so i could gain exposure or stardom. i didn't start reading blogs of other women because i wanted to see a photo of what they wore that day, every single day. i did it for the camaraderie. for the drawing or inspiration from their personal strength through their real lives, not these glamorous, professionally photographed, overly posed, unnatural outfit posts, and sponsored posts, and link up posts and giveaways and product reviews and so on and so forth.

i'm glad that i've finally found this space in this world where things i believe in and agree with are hugely represented, but i feel like a lot of those values are falling to the wayside and all in the name of free things and big statistics. things. and meaningless, though large, numbers. i don't care if you got that new bare minerals makeup for free or if you paid the whopping $29 for it. i also don't care if you have 200 followers or 2,000,000. i want the real stuff. i want life.  i want to feel like someone somewhere gets it. they understand. they have hard days too, even though it's easier to focus on the good ones. i want honest opinions. less "c/o", more "paid with hard earned money from my day job, because not everyone can afford to blog for a living". amen.